April 25, 2016
Xerox drops the most in a year after earnings miss estimates
"We're pulling all the levers within our control to successfully navigate in a challenging market environment and best position our businesses for the future."
Space Shuttle Xerox: Houston, we have a problem. We are no longer on the optimal glide path for safe reentry.
Houston: We need you to pull ALL the control levers and twist ALL the control knobs while simultaneously moving the yoke randomly in ALL directions.
Space Shuttle Xerox: Do you really think that will help?
Houston: It can't hurt. You're going to burn up anyway. Might as well go out in style.
Space Shuttle Xerox: ....
Houston: Do you copy?
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