The Sarcasm Report v.117

July 29, 2011
10 Ways to Get Americans Spending Again

Here's a summary.

1. Increase propaganda.
2. Plan to reduce the deficit.
3. Begin to fix housing.
4. Continue government tax breaks.
5. Increase government spending.
6. Increase government spending.
7. Increase government spending.
8. Reduce corporate profits.
9. Increase consumer saving.
10. Reduce exports.

Yes! It seems so easy and obvious. I wish I had thought of it.

I don't know what I like best. It's got everything.

On the one hand we'll be cutting Social Security benefits (#2) which should reduce spending. On the other hand, it will be offset by keeping Social Security taxes low (#4). Lose win!

Poor seniors will lose out (#2) but rich seniors will win it back (#9). Lose win!

I also like the idea that we'll start fixing the mortgage mess (#3). Somebody really needs to begin that process someday. Agreed.

The idea of giving American consumers more buying power for imported goods (#10) is amazingly good. We need to make sure we keep buying cheap goods Made in China like we have been. What's the harm to us if a billion Chinese are all burning oil bought with our stronger dollars? We can always print and/or borrow more someday.

And lastly, we definitely need to give Americans some reason to trust (#1). Our leaders must exude confidence at all times. It's the first rule of confidence games.

Genius!