Wednesday, May 28, 2008

The Sarcasm Report v.24

To Get Rich, Seek Out Rich Financial Advice

Another type of bad financial advice tells us to get a safe job, save money, live below our means, buy a house, get out of debt, and invest for the long term in a well-diversified portfolio of mutual funds. On those financial TV shows, I get into the most head-butting with the so-called financial experts who subscribe to this philosophy.

Yes, it is much better to get an unsafe job, spend money, live above your means, sell a house (preferably to a subprime borrower), get into debt, and invest for the short term in an undiversified portfolio of unknown funds. That sounds fantastic! Sign me up! I'd be "head-butting" too!



That's because, according to the Census Bureau, in 1999 the average U.S. income was $49,244. By 2006, the average income declined to $48,201. This means that U.S. workers haven't had a pay raise for seven years. So much for the advice about getting a safe job -- it's the opposite of rich advice.

We need to make THIS guy our next president. If we all became rich, nobody would need jobs. Genius! Why didn't anyone else think of that? The first step is to apparently quit the job you have. It is clearly going nowhere. Untold riches await you!

Moreover, in January 2008 the Federal Reserve Board dropped the interest rate twice over a period of just eight days, by a record 1.25 percent. If my crystal ball is accurate, I expect another .5 percent drop sometime later this year. Savers are actually losers, then, because interest rates are low and inflation is high. So urging people to save money isn't rich advice, either.

Yeah, it is much better to just burn through all the savings and have nothing left. Heck, spend even more than that. Use debt! That'll show 'em!

Warren Buffett has said that...

Don't even get me started on Warren Buffett. That fool is sitting on a $35 billion war chest ("savings") waiting for opportunities. Don't be like him. Quit your job and spend money like a drunken sailor before the government gets it!

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