Wednesday, May 23, 2012

A Managed Future (Musical Tribute)

There was a financial expert on CNBC this morning who said that we should look into managed futures as an alternative to cash and as something that can keep up with inflation.

An Introduction To Managed Futures

CTAs generally manage their clients' assets using a proprietary trading system or discretionary method that may involve going long or short in futures contracts in areas such as metals (gold, silver), grains (soybeans, corn, wheat), equity indexes (S&P futures, Dow futures, NASDAQ 100 futures), soft commodities (cotton, cocoa, coffee, sugar) as well as foreign currency and U.S government bond futures.

Awesome! Packed with all sorts of proprietary zero-sum game derivatives gambling goodness! The financial expert was a bit unclear how zero-sum games can keep up with inflation (for every winner there must be a loser). Let's not let that deter us though.

Let's find a good managed futures fund, shall we? Here's what I'm looking for.

1. Wise.
2. Strategic.
3. Innovative.
4. Award winning.

April 26, 2012
WisdomTree Receives Award for 'Most Innovative ETF' for Managed Futures Strategy Fund (WDTI)

NEW YORK, April 26, 2012 (GLOBE NEWSWIRE) -- WisdomTree (Nasdaq:WETF), an exchange-traded fund ("ETF") sponsor and asset manager, today announced the WisdomTree Managed Futures Strategy Fund (WDTI) has been recognized as the 'Most Innovative ETF in 2011' by a committee of analysts who cover ETFs in connection with Capital Link's 11th Annual Closed-End Fund and Global ETF Forum.

WisdomTree Managed Futures Strategy Fund

Expense Ratio: 0.95%
Cumulative Return Since Inception: -13.46%

Oh, yeah. That's a lot better than cash. Investors are no doubt sleeping like babies. You know, waking up every few hours and screaming for help.

(1-0.02-0.0095)^30 = 41%

That's how much real purchasing power you could have left after 30 years. I'm assuming the zero-sum game gambling gets you nowhere, we average 2% inflation, and the 0.95% annual expenses keep coming. What's not to like? Of course, I may be wrong. The fund appears to be well ahead of schedule.

I can't say for sure that this is sinister, but it could very well be Sinistar.

I am Sinistar
Beware coward
I hunger


Stagflationary Mark said...

Here's a sparkling review from the Yahoo message board.

January 26, 2012
not a good fund - move to HDG

Fair enough. Let's see how HDG has done.

May 6, 2012
I am out - waist of time

HDG must be a managed futures punned.

Get it? Anyone?

Man, tough audience tonight. ;)

mab said...


Don't waist your time or puns on HDG!

No pun intended? No pun achieved, on my part anyway!

mab said...

p.s. Blue Horseshoe loves Teldar Paper!

Puns never sleep!

Stagflationary Mark said...


In Europe and America, there's a growing feeling of hysteria. Conditioned to respond to all the threats, we must buy more managed futures with no regrets.

I am not waisted! I am not even Comfortably Numb. So don't call The Dream Police. Cheap Trick! I Surrender!

In all seriousness, I Dream of the Blue Turtles. They Sting. Hey You. Maybe it would be best to call The Police. Roxanne's red light is driving me up The Wall. ;)

mab said...


The Who "live" at Leeds. I'm serious, they all have houses there.

Stagflationary Mark said...


Love Shacks? Heart-Shaped Boxes? It's all good.

Got Cars? Let's Go! Nevermind. B-52s might be better.

With the Lights Out, I hear it's Nirvana.

mab said...

How about A Salt With A Deadly Pepa? My puns are Absolute Garbage!

By the way, which one's Pink?

WV = "doosedo"! Sounds like some kind of square safety dance.

Stagflationary Mark said...


You bring up Garbage and I Think I'm Paranoid.

What's new? ;)

mab said...

I got a Memo From Turner. It read: You're Never Alone With A Schizophrenic.

When I Grow Up, perhaps I'll understand it.

Speaking of Paranoid, there's probably a detached observer of your blog thinking U2 are Bad at puns.

Stagflationary Mark said...


Speaking of Paranoid, there's probably a detached observer of your blog thinking U2 are Bad at puns.


Yeah, we probably should have waited until Black Sabbath to be Paranoid. Have we lost our minds?

Now the time has come for bad puns to be shunned. But can we be blamed? Cracks us up with what we crave.

Nobody wants puns? They just turn their heads. Nobody speaks puns? Now we have our revenge!

Okay, puns were said. Fills the readers full of dread. Leaving as fast as they can. Bad puns live again!

mab said...

The first time I saw U2 was at the Live Aid concert in 1985. I was at the Philly venue (U2 was Wembly), but they had a simulcast. Prior to that I had never heard of U2. Here's a video of Bad from the show.

More recently, U2 did a show in Scotland. After quieting the crowd, Bono started to clap his hands every 5 seconds or so. After clapping for a spell, Bono proclaimed that every time he clapped his hands a child in Africa died. At that point a boisterous Scotman screamed out:

"then stop clapping you fucking idiot"!!!!!!

No good deed goes un-PUNished! That story still cracks me up.

Stagflationary Mark said...


Awesome story! Hahaha!