Friday, July 29, 2011

The Sarcasm Report v.117

July 29, 2011
10 Ways to Get Americans Spending Again

Here's a summary.

1. Increase propaganda.
2. Plan to reduce the deficit.
3. Begin to fix housing.
4. Continue government tax breaks.
5. Increase government spending.
6. Increase government spending.
7. Increase government spending.
8. Reduce corporate profits.
9. Increase consumer saving.
10. Reduce exports.

Yes! It seems so easy and obvious. I wish I had thought of it.

I don't know what I like best. It's got everything.

On the one hand we'll be cutting Social Security benefits (#2) which should reduce spending. On the other hand, it will be offset by keeping Social Security taxes low (#4). Lose win!

Poor seniors will lose out (#2) but rich seniors will win it back (#9). Lose win!

I also like the idea that we'll start fixing the mortgage mess (#3). Somebody really needs to begin that process someday. Agreed.

The idea of giving American consumers more buying power for imported goods (#10) is amazingly good. We need to make sure we keep buying cheap goods Made in China like we have been. What's the harm to us if a billion Chinese are all burning oil bought with our stronger dollars? We can always print and/or borrow more someday.

And lastly, we definitely need to give Americans some reason to trust (#1). Our leaders must exude confidence at all times. It's the first rule of confidence games.



Stagflationary Mark said...

As a side note, I am glad I'm not in charge of fixing this economy. I don't have many/any solutions. As is often true in life, it is far easier to see problems than fix them.

nanute said...

And as time moves forward in Washington, it is easier to create problems and make things worse, rather than fix them.

getyourselfconnected said...

You are going to love this one Mark:

Stagflationary Mark said...


And as time moves forward in Washington, it is easier to create problems and make things worse, rather than fix them.

Doctors practice medicine. One rule they have is to first do no harm.

I thought I was going to find an analogy between doctors and politicians but for the life of me I can't figure out how to get from Point A to Point B, lol. Sigh. ;)

Stagflationary Mark said...


You are so right! I LOVE IT!!!

Here's a link for the benefit of others.

Seems Legit

For those just tuning in, see the inside joke found here.

It's Candy Mountain time! :)