Saturday, May 6, 2017

4 Things That May Cause Magical Unicorns to Stampede Out of My Bottom

May 6, 2017
TheStreet: You Must Start Investing Now Because the Dow May Hit 100,000 By 2030

1. The blue-chip index is currently just shy of 21,000. A surge to 100,000 would represent a roughly 376% increase.

12.8% increase per year! Hello unicorns!

2. "If I'm wrong, it'll be 150,000," he said. "We're going to see incredible profits in the United States, as well as globally."

16.3% per year if he's wrong! If it's wrong to expect even more unicorns, then I don't want him to be right!

3. "You're going to live to 110 or 120."

I can actually feel the unicorns growing inside me! I sure hope the horns pass smoothly!

4. He said "retirement" won't exist in the 21st century.

Wow! I think each of the unicorns inside me may be pregnant. I better come up with a plan to put them all to work! Perhaps I can entice them to weave Dow 100k hats?


Stagflationary Mark said...

The last one's my favorite. I'm retired. It's the 21st century.

dearieme said...

What a remarkable coincidence. A bunch of half-marathoners ran along a road near us this morning, a group of whom were disguised as unicorns. Not convincing disguises, I'll grant you, but unmistakeable. I should have asked them for some investment advice, obvs.

Stagflationary Mark said...


It's way too early for my unicorns to have made it to you.

This can mean only one thing. Unicorns must be stampeding out of many bottoms!

There's never been a better time to invest in foods that unicorns eat, like candy corn that grows on rainbows! ;)

Rob Dawg said...

Elon Musk: “If we’re able to maintain a 50% growth rate for 10 years and achieve 10% profitability number and have a 20 P/E, our market cap would be basically the same as Apple’s is today,” Musk said. “Now, that’s going to require a bit —on the order of $700 [billion]. Obviously, getting there will require some significant capex.”

Talk about being knee deep in the unicorn skittles.

Stagflationary Mark said...

SpaceX + Unicorn Skittles Technology