The Sarcasm Report v.163

June 8, 2012
A stock that's safer than a T-bill

This power company's shares are backed by the full faith and credit of people who don't want their lights turned off.

Power companies are always safe stores of value during periods of financial hardship. No doubt about it. And with "con" in its name, what could possibly go wrong? Need proof? Enron? No con!

April 24, 1974
What Happened to Con Ed Could Happen to Others

New York, N.Y. - The individual investor who has always believed that even in a bear market utility stocks provided a relatively safe haven got a rude jolt Tuesday in the wake of Consolidated Edison's omission of its 45 cent quarterly dividend.

April 24, 1974
Financial Problems evident at Con Ed

Company spokesmen said the dividend suspension was needed to protect the company's cash resources "which have been adversely affected by the widening impact of sharply increased fuel costs, increases in accounts receivable from customers and reductions in revenues as a consequence of energy conservation."

Click to enlarge.

That could never happen again. And how do we know this? Jim Cramer tells us that this one stock is safer than treasury bills. Heck, there's no need to even diversify. Just pile in and sleep like a baby.

If that doesn't work, there is always the stock picking acumen of Lenny Dykstra. Jim Cramer told us that when it comes to investing, he's one of the great ones. It may require some patience though. Dykstra was recently sentenced to 3 years in jail after pleading no contest to grand theft auto and providing a false financial statement.

And if that doesn't work, we can always go back in time to the year 2000 and invest in Jim Cramer's Winners of the New World. That's bound to make more money than treasury bills!

Source Data:
Yahoo: Consolidated Edison Historical Prices