Tuesday, October 13, 2015

First World Problem of the Day

October 13, 2015
Aunt sues nephew, 12, for breaking her wrist during greeting

"I live in Manhattan in a third-floor walkup so it has been very difficult," Connell said. "And we all know how crowded it is in Manhattan."

We do know how crowded it is. You go, girl.

And if walking up stairs with an injured wrist wasn’t difficult enough, the after-effects on Connell’s social life have been disastrous.

Two whole flights of stairs with an injured wrist? Oh, the humanity! How does she endure? Has any human ever known such suffering?

“I was at a party recently and it was difficult to hold my hors d’oeuvres plate,” she added.

Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse! I can't even begin to imagine the horror.

Hopefully, the equivalent of 35 man-years of Chinese factory wages ($127,000) can somehow right the wrong of an 8-year-old boy (at the time of the incident) a bit too anxious to hug his loving aunt.


fried said...

So, she was planning on suing her nephew's parents, in hopes their liability insurance would pay? Or does her nephew have a cool 127,000 in his piggy bank?. Maybe he has a fat trust fund she was hoping to raid.
Call me dim, but I can't see what a broken wrist has to do with walking up a couple of flights of stairs. And she can't hold her hors d;oeuvres...so put down the drink and use your other hand. She can't figure that out on her own?
Thank god a judge tossed this...sanity prevails.

Stagflationary Mark said...


Actually, it made it to the jury and they awarded her nothing. Took them 25 minutes to decide. Saw it on the news when I was working out this evening.

I guess her hopes of earning 35 man-years of Chinese factory labor have been put on hold until she thinks up another brilliant idea. ;)