Friday, April 22, 2016

Today Only: Scandal Balloons, $18 Billion Each!

April 22, 2016
Cost of Volkswagen emissions scandal balloons to $18B

The estimated cost of Volkswagen Group's emissions scandal has escalated to more than $18 billion, more than double the amount the company had previously set aside, the company said Friday.

Get your scandal balloons now before the price goes up again! There's never been a better time to buy!!

These are premium scandal balloons guaranteed to never pop. Don't accept imitations! Ask our scandal balloon operators how you can get free shipping by buying the balloons in bulk. Call within the next 10 minutes and we'll automatically double your order. Just pay separate processing and handling.

Offer void where prohibited by law.

2 comments:

Mr. Slippery said...

Scandal balloons aren't void where prohibited by law. They were designed for all things prohibited by law. I would only want to fly my balloon where it was specifically prohibited by law, otherwise, I'd just buy a regular balloon. Too bad I can't afford a scandal balloon, unless it is priced in Zimbabwe dollars.

Stagflationary Mark said...

Are you actually accusing me of false advertising my scandal balloons?

That's awesome! It's a scandal balloon scandal! Woohoo! ;)