Two Subway Promotion Ideas

September 6, 2013
The Onion: New Subway Promotion To Honor Subtember 11

...visitors of the restaurant’s tens of thousands of franchise locations will be able to “fly on in” and pick up two footlong subs of their choice for only $9.11.

It just doesn't get any less politically correct than that. Or does it?

The Jared Fogle Septender

Up to 7 inches of tenderness sort of kind of NOT suitable for kids of all ages!!

I did not just go there. Oh, dear. I did.

Shame on me. Bad Mark! Bad! Bad!

How will Subway ever live this down? They bet the advertising farm on a "sure thing" who will be forever imprisoned in our thoughts.

July 7, 2015
We’re All Making The Same Dumbass Joke About Jared From Subway

We embrace anything that makes it possible for us to sound-off on any and every issue that comes our way. We condemn people in our court of public opinion where the trials last maybe three minutes, and that’s only if we are in a break between Netflix episodes.

Hey! My joke isn't the same! That said, I am in a break between Netflix episodes. Seriously. ;)