Friday, July 31, 2015

The 7 Stages of the Vegetarian Psychopath in the Making

1. Somebody else killed a plant. Didn't want it to go to waste. Ate it. Felt a bit guilty.
2. Killed a plant with own hands. Ate it. Felt indifferent.
3. Tortured a plant. Killed it. Ate it. Disappointed. Deserved a trophy.
4. Tortured a plant. Killed it. Took a picture of it. Mounted picture on wall. Put remains in compost bin.
5. Paid $500 to hunt an uncommon plant far from home. Tortured it. Killed it. Put its flower between pages of a book. Keep book under pillow.
6. Paid $50,000 to hunt rare plant in Africa. Tortured it. Killed it. Put its root in a box filled with extracted teeth. Keep box at office. Nobody else needs to know.
7. Root Canal Appreciation Day! Time to admire the box again! Woohoo!


Troy said...

I consider meat products the rent the animal pays for the industrial process that gave it life in the first place.

Farm animal life should be as humane as possible -- Golden Rule applies here.

Tuna is a different story, though since it's a predatory fish, catching and eating it is just fair turnabout.

Deer of course overwhelm their ecosystem without culling.

But shooting wild animals just for the sport of it is pretty sick, a mindless destruction of natural wealth.

Stagflationary Mark said...

As a society, we're not doing so well on the humanely as possible path, and yet I still eat chicken. Sigh.

My girlfriend has been trying hard to kick the meat habit though. So far, so good.