Tuesday, July 7, 2015

Retirement Panic Attack Averted

July 7, 2015
USA Today: The dirty secret behind your 'retirement number'

So, here I was enjoying a relaxing afternoon in the privacy of my own home in the Pacific Northwest, meaning no ill will to anyone and doing my best to only engage in legal activities, when I stumbled upon that headline. Imagine my shock and horror!

A dirty secret about my retirement number? What could it be!! Is my retirement number underage? Are there pictures of it circulating all over the Internet? Is it in some way tied to the publicity fiasco going on over at Subway right now?

I was forced to click on the link! I must know!!

Turns out that the only dirty picture was just some guy, presumably a paid model of legal age, fondling a small calculator with his middle finger. I kid you not. It's fairly disgusting, but I'm pretty sure it is all perfectly legal. I got worked up over nothing. Whew! ;)


Rob Dawg said...

The four point type white on silver background makes it legal. Just like Beck's Beer brewed in St. Louis.

dearieme said...

Our government is calling for comments on encouraging people to save more for retirement.

My guess is that it wants to give more incentives to low earners and less to high earners who would doubtless save anyway, incentives or no. It probably also wants to shift the payment of incentives into the far future when it won't be in office.

Stagflationary Mark said...

Rob Dawg,

I think you are right. Would explain why so few bank executives were convicted for all the criminal activity relating to the housing bust. Perhaps there is some fine print on all that shredded documentation.

Stagflationary Mark said...


Any incentive offered before the global robotic apocalypse but not paid until after it is money well spent, lol. Sigh.