Quote of the Day

September 24, 2015
The Onion: CEO Has Big Ideas To Grow Company’s Problems

"I was initially skeptical of any aggressive growth strategy given the current size of our company’s problems, but after hearing Adam outline his proposals, I’m now completely confident that we can double the size of our problems over the next quarter."

Rumor has it that his main proposal involved merging with Volkswagen. He seems to be a day late and a dollar short though. That ship has sailed. ;)