Wednesday, August 12, 2015

Possible Cause of New Folsom Prison Riot

August 12, 2015
100-Inmate Riot at New Folsom Prison Leaves One Dead, at Least Five Stabbed

In a statement, a corrections department spokesperson said administrators are still investigating the cause of the riot.

Three words: "Whatchu lookin' at?"

Maximum security, baby. That's what I'm talking about.

1 comment:

Stagflationary Mark said...

Other possible causes:

Bitch, whatchu lookin' at?
Whatchu lookin' at bitch?

It takes more effort to say these four word variants so you want to be especially careful with your reply. Don't show weakness. A slight smirk with two seconds of direct eye contact to start, then quickly look down at your shoes while shrugging your shoulders and slowly backing away. Listen for movement heading in your direction. If you hear any, run! Don't just run anywhere though. Pick a place where you cannot ever be cornered. Stay away from dead ends and fences.

Oh, crap. I was looking at the wrong guide. This advice is intended for meeting a gang on the city streets just after midnight. Never mind. Sorry about that.