Wednesday, August 26, 2015

The No @#$% Sherlock Report v.003

August 26, 2015
Despite stock fall, financial health of many is still solid

Add it up, and the evidence suggests that many Americans — though certainly not all — are doing comparatively well.

Many? Was "most" too strong a word? Why? Couldn't we make it to at least half? Is that how f%^ked up our country really is?

If I was throwing a party at our house for the top 1% and even 1/10000th of them showed up, do you know what I would say?

1. OMG! There are way too many of you! I don't have enough chairs!!
2. Isn't it great to live in a country where so many of you are doing comparatively awesome? Thanks so much for taking the time out of your busy schedules to attend! There are burgers on the BBQ and the refreshments are in the cooler. Enjoy!
3. For those interested, we'll be showing a movie about the declining middle class on the TV in the family room. Or, alternatively, you can play with our dogs in the backyard. Wow! You all want to play with our dogs? I didn't expect so many of you to be pet lovers! Fantastic!!


Stagflationary Mark said...

ESP & Psychic Powers: Claims Inconclusive

Many Americans believe in psychic ability (about 15 percent of the country, according to a 2005 Baylor Religion Survey; and 41 percent in another survey), but scientific evidence for its existence remains elusive. And it's not for lack of trying; people — and the U.S. government — have spent decades searching for ESP.

I'm [7] thinking of a [7] number between 0 and 10. Can anyone [7] guess what it is?

Don't peek!

It was 7! Any psychics out there? ;)

dd said...

Cramer must have ghosted that piece. Then again the reporters are based in NY and Washington DC. No doubt things are great for the upper 10% government/banking employees. Must get out the dip!

Stagflationary Mark said...


Things are great for "many" of the upper 10% government/banking employees. Not all though.

Two words: Ashley Madison

Hahaha! Sigh.